I always told myself birthday isn't a day for me to celebrate, is a day for reminding myself to seek for the motive to live and meaning of life.
Although I dont agree with my mom for most of the time but Im truly grateful and sorry for her hard time on my birthday.
Just so you know, I dont really celebrate birthday with my family. I got a lil extra emotional on every year of my birthday ever since I knew I can celebrate it.
It's bad because I always set some sort of expectation. I expect my friend to surprise me, I expect my parents to remember my birthday without me reminding, I expect my boyfirend to put in extra effort than he can (when I have a boyfriend).
All these would actually put me down and disappoint myself in all ways. It felt truly terrible.
For now and today, I've learn to be grateful.
I need to be calm even there's no birthday cake, I need to be happy still even people break their promises. Because my birthday wont just end here. I need to let go to be happy.
Today is a sunshine Sunday. I've got a long sleeps. Taken care of the babies and now I shall go for a long drive for a clean and fresh mind for me to start work on Monday.
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